Clay Turns 4

Clay,

I remember thinking two years ago when you turned two, and Carter was about to turn 4, trying to imagine what you'd be like as a 4 year old. I couldn't imagine it. You still seemed like such a baby. And now, that you're four, I have the same problem with Vivi. Maybe because Carter is the oldest, I can always imagine what he will be like (or you know, what I think he'll be like) in a few years. But for you and your sister, I think you'll always be babies. Is this what Mamas mean when they say "you'll always be my baby"? But, I have two of you since I have one girl baby and one boy baby? Oh, my baby boy.


This year, you have been so much healthier than in years past. Since we've finally figured out the lactose intolerance thing it has made life so much easier. Your gut is still sensitive to what I call 'overindulgence' though. Today was a good example, all the Thanksgiving food and sweets did you in today. I am so sorry. I have such a hard time mediating between letting you enjoy the food you want to eat and holding you back 'for your own good'. Because 'for your own good' isn't a good reason for a 4 year old. You don't seem to believe me when I tell you that you're going to be in some serious pain in a few days if you keep eating this stuff. 'In a few days' is a lifetime away for someone who's four I guess.

You are so sweet, and just love people to love you. You mostly want to snuggle and tell people you love them.

You're very spiritual, I know the Lord is speaking to you. Sometimes it's strange, because I've never heard a 3 (now 4 year old) talk much about Jesus and the Bible. You talk about Jesus very often and tell me the things he says to you. You tell me that you can't hear him in your ears, but in your heart. This is strange to me, because I don't think anyone had ever used that terminology in front of you (hearing Jesus in your heart) before you told me about it the first time.
When our good friend Garrett died last month, you were very concerned - since you were the one with me when I got the phone call...until you asked me, "Is he in Heaven?" When I told you that yes, he was. You told me, "Well then Miss Meg and Beckett will see him again there, mom!" You were no longer sad. You tell me that it will be so wonderful because when you go to heaven one day because your tummy won't hurt anymore and you tell Carter that he won't have headaches anymore. Sometimes you blow my mind and I hope you continue to grow in your relationship with the Lord. I think what you have is special, a gift.

You are such a different child than your brother. You are introverted, but sweet. You are curious, but quiet. You are so smart but you don't announce what you know, until you are certain it is right. You don't have any toy or TV show that your obsessed with like most boys. You don't love trains or cars or optimus prime or dinosaurs. This makes you very hard to shop for. You told me you wanted green balloons, a whoopee cushion, and a basket of kittens for your birthday.
You love, love, love our new kitty, Sansa. Y'all have a special relationship as well because he lets you, and only you, carry him around rag doll style. He is so tolerant of you. He must know that even though you are very rough with him, that you love him so much.

You are so smart and capable. I can't believe you can ride your bike without training wheels already. You are learning to read (and point out familiar sounds in the books we read). You can count pretty high and add single digit numbers.

This year for your birthday we went to Mulligan's, one of those mini golf/arcade/go-kart places. You do really like arcades. You love to play skee ball and you love all that little crap you get to 'buy' with your tickets. Nana and Pop were lucky enough to be here and enjoy the day with us. You had birthday pancakes (complete with sprinkles and icing!) and birthday cake (the next day because we stayed at Mulligan's way too late.)

You are so special and I love you big boy.

Love,
Mama